When married couples decide to go their separate ways, a considerable number of people will immediately turn to divorce to dissolve their marriage, which is usually due to a lack of knowledge about the other possible options.
If your marriage doesn't work out, yet you desire to get out of it without draining your bank account dry or dragging your children through the lengthy and tortuous divorce process, you might want to think about other divorce options that might help you lessen the pain. This blog discusses some of the alternatives you might want to consider before taking your matter to court.
Alternatives to Divorce
There are numerous divorce alternatives available. Each one is slightly distinct from the previous one, but they all result in divorce. With so many alternatives, you're bound to find one that best meets your ultimate aims. These alternatives include:
Mediation
A low-cost approach to discussing divorce arrangements without having to go through court and letting two people come to an agreement that best suits their demands.
Collaborative Divorce
This process, which is more affordable than a contested divorce, enlists the help of several professionals to help spouses identify the underlying difficulties in their relationship and determine their actual objectives during the settlement.
Arbitration
On the other hand, this court-ordered process is subject to similar restrictions as divorce litigation.
Separation
Sometimes married couples desire to take some time off but aren't prepared to divorce. A "separation" occurs when spouses live separately yet remain legally married. You do not have to reside in different places to be considered separated; you could choose to stay under the same roof as roommates instead of as husband and wife (for monetary or any other reason).
Annulment
A marriage annulment occurs when a judge determines that your marriage or your domestic partnership is no longer legally recognized. Since the marriage or domestic relationship was never legitimate, it's as if it had never existed following an annulment.
Conscious Uncoupling
This might have different meanings for different people. However, at its foundation, conscious uncoupling entails a couple seeking to part with as little emotional trauma as possible.
Now let’s take a deeper look at each of these alternatives.
Mediation
Mediation is a method of resolving a divorce or custody dispute that gives you the authority to dictate the outcome. Dissimilar to arbitration proceedings or litigation, whereby an arbitrator or a judge makes the final verdict, mediation allows only the parties concerned in the conflict to make their decisions.
Most California couples believe that choosing mediation to terminate their union reduces the expense and strain of divorce. In mediation, a skilled, neutral expert engages with the parties (personally or via online dialogues) to assist them in negotiating and resolving the key problems in their split. Couples that negotiate a marriage settlement arrangement through mediation save money and time by not going through the courts.
You can undergo mediation at any stage during the process of divorce, including when the divorce is finalized. If you prefer an uncontested divorce procedure in the state of California but are having problems reaching an agreement with your husband or wife on various subjects, a mediator may be available to assist you. You could be capable of concluding the divorce without using lawyers if you do it this way.
Although they've engaged lawyers, couples can also resort to mediation while their case progresses after filing for divorce. For example, one partner might become ready for mediation once the "discovery" phase has disclosed a true image of the partners' finances, such as any undisclosed assets.
Mediation is often less unpleasant and less costly than going through a divorce in court, and it moves much more quickly. Mediation allows couples to retain control and authority in their divorce by allowing them to make the final decision rather than relying on a court.
Even in circumstances when ineffective communication became the reason for the marriage's failure, mediation allows partners to improve their communication skills. With the support of a skilled professional, communication-challenged spouses can triumph in mediation.
Collaborative Divorce
This is a fairly new approach to resolving challenges that arise whenever a marriage ends. Consider collaborative divorce to blend a regular divorce and mediation with attorneys. The partners hire attorneys who commit to utilizing non-adversarial methods to resolve conflicts. The aim is to reach a win-win settlement that addresses both parties' needs while averting litigation. Collaborative attorneys are dedicated to resolving conflicts rather than causing them.
For the procedure to work, both sides must cooperate and be willing to compromise. The procedure is pointless if either or both sides refuse to compromise on their problems.
All sides and their lawyers enter into a "participation agreement" at the start of the proceedings. When the collaborative divorce lawyers are unable to establish a deal on the conditions of the dissolution and must litigate, a participation arrangement prevents them from defending either spouse. When the collaborative approach fails, both parties must seek new legal counsel before proceeding with litigation. Each of the parties consults with their lawyers individually first to outline what they hope to accomplish.
After both sides have established their objectives, four-way talks between both sides and their attorneys are held. Other experts may attend these sessions, such as:
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Experts on child custody
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Financial specialists
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Mental health specialists
A certified mediator may be called in when both sides are having problems agreeing. Except for the partners and lawyers, every party should be impartial and exclusively interested in negotiating the divorce settlement without going through the courts.
Collaborative divorce has several advantages over conventional divorce. If you would like to negotiate the conditions of the split outside of court, the collaborative divorce option could be suitable for you. However, you'd be more confident having the counsel of a seasoned lawyer by your side.
Because your collaborative attorney will be defending you alone, he/she will be able to counsel you throughout the process. Based on your connection with your partner, you might find it difficult to speak openly or be aggressive. In this case, you might benefit from having an experienced lawyer. Most significantly, collaborative divorce could save households a huge amount of stress. A prolonged, confrontational trial can worsen already strained relationships.
Separation
Separation from your spouse is not similar to divorce, irrespective of whether you've had a court-ordered "judgment of separation." Separation refers to the fact that you're staying separately from your partner but remain legally married till you obtain a decree of divorce. Even though a separation does not end your union, it impacts your financial obligations until the divorce is finalized.
When spouses divorce, the financial advantages of the marriage are highly likely to be lost. Most husbands and wives share perks like combined tax filing, Social Security benefits, and family health coverage provided by either spouse's employment.
Separations enable both spouses to continue receiving these privileges without having to file for divorce. Some couples can preserve a better quality of life while still effectively eliminating their marital commitments by living separately while still married.
Deciding to avoid a divorce in return for matrimonial benefits, on the other hand, is commonly a short-term approach. If either partner wants to marry somebody else legitimately, they must seek a divorce to avoid committing bigamy. On the other hand, separation might be a viable alternative if both couples are in better standing and would like to enjoy the benefits till each side has the chance to structure their benefit plans.
Spending Some Time Apart May Encourage Reconciliation
Additionally, spending some time apart might be quite beneficial for partners who aren't sure if they need to dissolve their marriage. You may conclude that it is the best option and feel comfortable going forward with the divorce proceeding by spending some time away from your partner before filing for divorce.
Both couples may be able to resume doing hobbies or any other elements of life that they thought were missed throughout their marriage. When both partners are willing to reconcile, some time apart can be used for spousal and individual counseling to assist them in overcoming any marital concerns.
Separation could also be the weapon you require to bring your relationship back on course if you are contemplating divorce but aren't sure you would like to dissolve the marriage.
Irrespective of how pleasant the divorce is, the process is often lengthy and complicated, especially if young children or substantial assets are involved. Other legal issues raised throughout the divorce process include custody of children, maintenance, alimony, and property distribution, which need to be resolved even before your divorce can be finalized.
Tensions are generally high throughout a divorce, which could also lead to disputes becoming increasingly acrimonious because each spouse experiences increasing stress levels and aggravation with the proceedings.
Separation can help you deal with many elements of divorce much more rationally, such as determining custody of children and splitting marital assets. With no court fees or deadlines hanging over your heads, you might find it much easier to navigate these legal issues with separation.
Annulment
The parties may contemplate alternatives to divorce, like annulment, whenever a marriage falls apart. Like the Roman Catholics, some religions might regard annulment as a particularly enticing option. If your faith opposes remarriage following divorce, then annulment could enable you to continue with a remarriage that's both religious and civilly legitimate.
An annulment differs from a divorce in that the partners are regarded as if they'd never been married, to begin with. Following an annulment, your official status on official documents will be documented as "single" instead of "divorced."
If you have children from an annulled marriage, they will still be recognized legally. Unfortunately, they might not be deemed valid in the sight of your faith. This is something to think about if you're choosing whether or not an annulment of your marriage is the best option for you.
A second distinction is that so many states now accept no-fault divorces, which enables partners to end their union without having to prove that one partner committed adultery or any other kind of misconduct. In contrast, if you're seeking a formal annulment, you'll need a reason other than irreconcilable disagreements to support the dissolution of your marriage.
Following your civil annulment, you will be allowed to split your assets in a similar way to how you would have gone through a standard divorce. If you and your partner have children, similar laws that apply to conventional divorce will also apply to assessing child maintenance and custody concerns.
A civil annulment is the only way to officially end your marriage as well as any responsibilities that come with it. Religious annulments usually only impact one's status within a particular faith and therefore are not sanctioned by the state or any other official bodies.
Grounds for Civil Annulment
Only one of the following reasons can be used to get a civil annulment, which formally terminates the marriage: fraud, deceit, absence of consummation, bigamy, incest, force, unsound mind, or absence of consent. This will almost certainly necessitate consulting a lawyer, something you might not have to do if you are considering a no-fault dissolution of your marriage.
You can demonstrate the reasons for civil annulment when:
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One partner is unable to have children and may have deceived the other partner about his or her condition
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There is incest, which is described as a relationship that exists between close relatives who, in that state, would be prohibited from marrying legally
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One partner is already legally married to someone else (bigamy)
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One partner is young and cannot consent for himself or herself, and the other partner does not get approval from the partner's parents
Divorce Arbitration
During the arbitration, spouses consent to the engagement of an arbitrator, to help them make similar decisions that a judge would, and also agree to accept the arbitrator's conclusions as if they were made by a judge. Arbitration has many of the same benefits as mediation, such as timeliness, effectiveness, confidentiality, affordability, and straightforwardness.
This method has been employed in other types of litigation for years, and it's beginning to gain traction among divorce attorneys as a viable alternative to court proceedings. The arbitrator is often an attorney or a former judge, and you pay him or her on an hourly basis. Your attorney and your partner's attorney will most likely consent to an arbitrator who will be suitable for your case.
Just like in a court, each party compiles arguments and information to give to the arbitrator, who ultimately makes the decisions. However, evidence is frequently presented in a less formalized manner. You'll be capable of scheduling an arbitration hearing far more swiftly than you'll be able to bring a dispute to court. In contrast to a court hearing, which is accessible to the general public, arbitration is private. However, if you choose arbitration to settle the marital disputes, the records will remain public.
Another advantage of arbitration is its reduced cost; while it's still costly, it is much less than a trial. Since your attorney won't have to spend as much time preparing for the case, and since the arbitrator will not be as particular about proof as any judge would be, the arbitration process itself could be shorter.
An arbitrator's decision is usually final, which means you cannot ask for a reversal or go before a judge for another opportunity. You also have no right to challenge the verdict in a court of law, so the arbitrator's rules are final. Some people dislike the concept of arbitration given the inevitable uncertainty of divorce disputes, whereas others may prefer the assurance that arbitration provides.
Conscious Uncoupling
There's no precise meaning to the phrase, but it refers to the aim of terminating a marriage in a pleasant, collaborative, and courteous manner. When consciously uncoupling, the partners seek to end the marriage with understanding and respect and emphasize the positive elements of the relationship instead of focusing on the negatives.
In other words, voluntarily uncoupling has no constitutional consequences for the relationship. It'll not end the relationship, split property, allocate obligations, or arrange for child maintenance and custody. Partners still need to go through the divorce process to end their marriage.
In many states, couples can also engage in a formal separation agreement, in which a court divides property, awards custody of children, establishes child support, and determines who is accountable for spousal debts.
The partners will gain the most from this approach of conscious uncoupling. Divorce is commonly recognized as a devastating experience in couples' lives, and it is particularly true for those with young children. Furthermore, lengthy and bitter divorce procedures can add significantly to the cost of the case and prohibit the partners from moving forward with their lives.
Find a San Diego Divorce Attorney Near Me
Divorce is often emotionally and financially draining. Fortunately, it isn't the only option for spouses who want to start over. Separation, mediation, conscious uncoupling, and annulments might help to lessen the impact on the whole family and serve as a platform for a peaceful transition to a new chapter in your life.
If you are unsure how to proceed with your divorce, you can contact the San Diego Family Law Attorney. Our attorneys will assess your situation and assist you in determining the best course of action for you and your partner. Call us right now at 619-610-7425.
